Thursday, September 20, 2012

Ruchi's

It's just a fact that everybody who's ever consumed any sort of alcoholic beverage in Houston has been to Ruchi's. I'm not really sure why, I just go because that's what Houstonians do and I live in perpetual fear that somebody is going to notice that I'm actually a transplant and this guy I dated my freshman year of college had to actually explain to me what Westheimer was. I thought it was an abbey in England. (I'm just kidding guys I'm not that much of an idiot.)(Mostly.) For those of you who maybe don't blend in to the Houston scene as well as I do, I'll give you a break down on why Ruchi's is the best place in the world when maybe you had a bowl of French onion soup in which the alcohol wasn't completely boiled out.

Obviously the most important thing about Ruchi's is they are open 24 hours. And, located at 3102 S Shepherd Dr, they are the 24 hour Mexican restaurant closest to the bars and apartments I like to imbibe at. +23 I don't want you to think I'm the kind of tacky person who drinks and drives, because I'm not, that's what sober people are for, at any given time, I think we can agree that over half the population is sober, but after about 11:30 no matter how much sleep I've been getting, my eye lids kind of start to turn down on the edges and I want food. This is my number one desire after ten o'clock post meridian. Foooood. Ruchi's is right there, and I can get in there, do my late night binge eating, and then get out before my official midnight bedtime. *Times are approximate, their service maybe isn't the fastest.

What else is great about Ruchi's, you ask? They're one of those great Mexican restaurants that always brings two kinds of salsa. I love this, because 9 times out of 10 I'm going to passionately hate one of them. If they just bring me one salsa, I'm going to love it no matter what, because I have to. Two salsas gives me the freedom to despise, and as a lady I need that. +8 Personally, I hate their green salsa and love their red salsa, but I reserve the right to change my mind on that tomorrow as is my duty as a woman.

Here's the thing. You know what Ruchi's has in their ladies' room? Actually advertisements. That's right. You're not looking at the newspaper when you pee, like other bathrooms. You're looking at ads that people have posted! And they're for the weirdest things, too! There's this study at Rice, and they need people who have never smoked a cigarette, and people who smoke cigarettes all the time and have no intention of ever quitting. They have a club, though let's face it, I'd much rather go from the club to Ruchi's than from Ruchi's to the club, that's just me. I want to say there was an advertisement for quinceaneras too, but I was there a while ago and I don't really remember and am probably just being racist. All I'm saying is, this is exactly what I've been missing! Haven't we all been sitting at home flipping through our magazines or watching television and thinking to ourselves, gosh, I'd really like to go to a restaurant right now, but then I'd have to stop having my thoughts infiltrated by the marketing of companies I'll probably never use! +10 Ruchi's just solves all my problems now I never have to be without the subtle messages of the media.

Look here's what everyone needs to know. Every time I've been to Ruchi's, I've parked next door in the Petsmart parking lot. Here's the thing. You don't have to park next door in the Petsmart parking lot. What I never knew before a week ago is that, in fact, Ruchi's has a parking lot BEHIND their store location, accessible only from Richmond and not from Shepherd at all. Just so you know. You're welcome, teammates.
Ruchi's Taqueria Las Americas on Urbanspoon

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