Niko Niko's - Market Square Park

This goes along with Dot's Diner as being one of those restaurants I just can't hold out on anymore. This Niko Niko's is a stand in Market Square Park, downtown, at the intersection of around Preston and the one after Main, you know the road. It's obviously owned by the same people who own the Midtown Niko Niko's, but they have a much smaller menu. One time I went to Niko Niko's - this is my favorite Niko Niko's story - and this woman came up to my date and I asking if we had any change. "I'm not going to spend it on food or anything," she told us. "I'll be real honest, it's my birthday, and I'm going to spend it on some weed." It's just refreshing that the Niko Niko's homeless people are so much more honest than the UH homeless people or that guy who always hangs out at the Shell station on Buffalo Speedway. +8

Anyways so I took my parents here on Monday and there were no homeless people. +3 There was a Segway tour however (-6) which I thought was silly. What are you going to do on a Segway in downtown Houston? "Hey guys, these are all the places that nobody famous has ever stayed or been." Ooh they could go by the old Enron building that's always a good stop on any notoriety tour of Houston. Other than that though the only people who live in Houston are the newly rich oil tycoons who haven't had a chance to move to New York and also people who own restaurants and people who work in restaurants. And also people who own Segway tours.

Back to the review however, like I mentioned before Niko Niko's is in Market Square park. There's a kiosk where you can buy your food and then they have tables and a bit of a covered patio but the cover has holes in it so I never understood its function to be anything but decorative, but whenever I want to look at something decorative I look at the weird sculptures they keep there or the September 11th memorial, not the fake roof on their patio. I don't want to sound critical though, what, do you think the name of my blog is arbitrary criticism, or something? I just wanted to use my blog's name to boost my Google SEO scores. So anyway as I was saying there's no protection from the elements here in Market Square Park and it was a very windy day. Not to mention, I'd describe the air as having a chill in it! A chill and a breeze? Look Niko Niko's I didn't drive SEVERAL blocks from my house (ride really, my father was driving) just to sit in a park on an overcast day. I sit in parks on sunny days, on days when, after I've finished my meal, I can get up and admire a nice golden tan creeping across my usually pale flesh. Yes, I just used the word flesh in a family appropriate blog. Looks like we'll have to boost the rating to mature. I was very disappointed in Niko Niko's especially considering that I had to impress my out of town guests. -23

They have some very climbable looking trees in the park (+8) though I've never climbed them (-6). What's best about Market Square Park though is that they're really a dog park. I mean sure they have events and concerts and things there - I wish I could update you on them, but the printout they have plastered to the side of Niko Niko's went officially out of date November 11 (-11). Mostly, though, it's just a dog park. There's a bowl of dog treats that's always next to the patio so while you're eating delicious Greek food your dog can eat something that probably tastes like dirt. And when I was there on Monday there was this truly adorable little spaniel (+87) and this fat little mutt (+92) that were walking and waddling around the park, respectively. It's nice to have scenery to spot around you other than the pigeons and how trendy the bars across the street are.

Anyway. That's about all the information you need to know about Niko Niko's in Market Square Park. I wholeheartedly recommend it, drop me a line at arbitrarycriticism@live.com!